If you also spent most of the last day or two trying to get Peter Molyneaux's new game Curiosity to work you may find the above image mildly amusing as I did. Also you need to have seen the original super scary serial killer movie Seven to get the joke. And if you haven't seen Seven then hell, see it immediatly, David Fincher's amazing film still gives me chills. Seems 22 Cans have a few bugs to iron out before the answer to the mysteries of life can be discovered by a collaboration of puzzle solving iPad users.
So some people thought Dawnguard was a bit light on, and Hearthstone was basically a Sims mod, well Bethesda are taking another shot at DLC with Dragonborn. The below trailer features a whole new island location, a host of new enemies and a new big bad guy who has the same Dovahkin abilities as you. Best of all, looks like you can now ride Dragons, sweeeeeet.
And is that new location a little familiar to long term Elder Scroll fans?
In their continued campaign to become masters of all the most beloved forms of pop culture the House of Mouse have purchased the House that George Built. That’s right, Disney now owns Star Wars alongside other acquisitions of the last few years such as The Muppets and Marvel Comics.
Alongside this announcement was the news Disney wants to have a new Star Wars movie in cinemas by 2015 followed by new movies “every two to three years”. That could be a good thing, away from the complete control of Lucas a new Star Wars film has the potential to be okay. Rumour also has it the first three films will be long talked about third trilogy focusing on the later years of Luke Skywalker and his compatriots. What’s less exciting is the fate of Dark Horse Comics acclaimed and excellent line of Star Wars comics which have long been considered the saving grace of the expanded universe, keeping fans happy while they spat popcorn at the screen during the prequels and brand relevant. In Disney’s hands the twenty year relationship between Dark Horse (also home to creator owned works like Hellboy and Sin City) could be in jeopardy with Disney perhaps keen to tie their new acquisition and all its comic assets back to its last acquisition Marvel Comics. We’ll have to wait and see.
In game news the purchase won’t affect the production of Uncharted mod Star Wars 1313 which is still lined up for a 2012 release.
In the final analysis, this is probably a good thing overall. While Disney may be largely distrusted and seen as a corporate entity by geekdom, that entity is extremely good at making entertainment. If you’re worried about Disney ‘diluting the brand’ by churning out movies and products, well you might have just woken up from a 15 year coma. This year for Halloween you could buy Sexy Chewbacca and Sexy Yoda costumes. Anything Disney does couldn’t be worse than that.
Xcom may be the greatest game this year, perhaps of all time, from now till the end of time, in short I really like it. It's super fun. I'll have a review that's basically a 500 word sentence about how amazing it is real soon, but in the mean time Firaxis have all ready announced new DLC for the title.
The first DLC will be titled Slingshot and feature three distinct missions on three unique maps that can be played at any time and star a playable Chinese operative named Zhang. Completing Slingshot early in the game will give you access to the uber powerful Blaster Launcher, a weapon that normally takes some late game research to gain access too. As far as I'm concerned, any excuse to play more Xcom is a good excuse.
Eli Roth, best known as torture porn autere and director of Hostel, went to the jungle and held a screening of Cannibal Holocaust for an isolated tribe of Amazon's because of course he did.
We're talking about the same Cannibal Holocaust about a group nature documentarians who run afoul of a group of amazon natives who slaughter and eat them. The film is largely garbage but has a greater reputation for the insane rumours that have surrounded the film, like an Italian court arresting and charging the director of the film with murder when authorities refused to believe the film wasn't footage of actual killing, lead actor Robert Kerman being a porn star having a stab at mainstream acting, the fact all the animals in the film were actually killed, including two monkeys as the monkey killing seen had to be reshot, and the main reason you probably haven't seen it, the film was completely banned in Australia until a few years ago with customs officers seizing and destroying any copies posted into the country.
So while scouting locations for his new movie (also about cannibals in the Amazon jungle) Eli and co met a remote tribe who would be perfect extras. To convince them to be in the movie they agreed to buy them a boat and a bunch of medical supplies, and to show them what a movie actually was, as the tribe had never seen one before, they screened Cannibal Holocaust for them. Although Eli doesn't credit the idea as being his own he was pleasently surprised to find the villagers though Cannibal Holocaust was hilarious. Personally that would be cause for concern.
I'm very excited for Assassin's Creed 3 Liberation, maybe even as equally excited as I am for Assassin's Creed 3 which I'm so excited for I'm even going to attend my first midnight launch to get a copy (and for an old man like me who falls asleep watching TV at 9pm this is a big deal, also likely dangerous).
The PS Vita game stars the first Assassin's Creed female lead in Aveline, a Louisana dame who attends parties and socialises when she isn't smuggling, wrestling gators or slicing the hell out of Spanish soldiers with her sugar cane machete. She looks like an amazing character and I'm looking forward to diving into her story as soon as I can scrape together cash for a PS Vita. Hopefully Aveline gets enough attention and moves enough units to graduate to a console release as well. Embedded below is the recently released story trailer but to really sell you on it seek out some gameplay videos.
Well it's been a far greater break than I expected, moving house and then no internet and then crap internet and then I was attacked by a giant lizard (it wasn't so much an attack as it was I just saw one as I left the bottle shop and then it ran under a freezer but it was really big, about three feet long, and I got excited and then forgot to write anything last night because I was telling everyone about the huge lizard attack I barely survived) but now I'm back to regularly schedule writing.
Expect more reviews and musings and random crapola very soon.
Okay, it looked super staged and the behaviour of those involved is a bit too hammy to be realistic, and I'm sure this is either viral marketing for some upcoming movie or TV show. But I still got a tiny thrill watching this video that appears at first glance to be someone teleporting a cyclist, fully Nightcrawler/Quantum Leap style out of the way of an oncoming truck. The real genius here is the clearly miraculous act being captured by an inocuous traffic camera. Well worth one minute of your day to watch.
In case by some cruel twist of nature you were, like me, trapped in a damn training workshop all yesterday getting glared at for checking your iPhone, you might have missed the second trailer for The Hobbit An Unexpected Journey that debuted yesterday. Well it is absolutely amazing. Sadly, despite some good shots of the creatures that will menace our half pint heroes, we still don't get a good look at Smaug. I am literally chomping my fingers to stumps waiting to see what the infamous dragon looks like. Still, I teared up, honestly I wept, just watching it. Just ask my wife, you'll have to phone her at her mothers though, she packed up and left when she saw me weeping over a movie trailer on her laptop.
I don't need her though, I've got Hobbits and Dwarves and the dragon Smaug, and Gandalf and Radagast the Red and so many other things I can't wait to see on the big screen. Sure some people don't like Peter Jackson's vision of Middle Earth, and yes, these people need to be rounded up and put in a big brother style house, only we never let them out and they spend the rest of their lives mugging like twats for cameras that aren't there. HA HA HAAAA!